Elv_Elijah_Wan's Blog

A friend once asked me a question:”Do you think that 0.5+0.5=1 or 1+1=1?”. At that moment I pondered and eventually chose 1+1=1, because I “felt” that it was more “complete”. My friend proceeded to compliment my choice, saying that that was also that person’s choice, but what is such a simple question trying to bring out?

This question can actually be applied in many areas of our lives, be it relationships, friendship…etc. I think it’s trying say that :”We often think that in order to be “complete” we must find another person that can fill the void in us”. But the problem is this, how can an incomplete and another incomplete make a complete?  “0.5″ symbolizes people who are lacking in some areas, maybe ermm.. this person has a bad temper, then searches his/her partner to be a patient person so that it can compliment that weakness. It does not work this way.

To make a complete relationship/friendship…We ourselves have to be Complete in order to find another complete! That was where I remember that we are most complete in Jesus Christ! Man was made in the image of God, in the sense Man(Humanity as whole) is most completed and perfected when we are with Jesus.

Philippians 1:6
being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

I guess now the problem is not knowing but persevering, there may be times we wanna quit, let go and give up. I think in the gym as I trained, there were times I just wanna stop and go home, sleep! But as I progress on persevering, I can start to see changes taking place.

James 1:4
Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I also think obedience is an important factor too…..well time to apply

Wow it has indeed been a very long time since I’ve blogged. Recently many things had happened to me, especially in the area of relationship, specifically BGR. I am not ashamed for expressing myself nor blogging about this. I just feel that I didn’t handle things well  as I feel that I’ve hurt her through some things I did. Anyways I just want to write about other stuff, maybe just to journal down my thoughts.

Recently I just feel so relieved and peaceful for being a Christian. I can’t imagine life without God. In life we always experience setbacks, disappointments and failures but as Christians we can go, we can go back to our Beloved Father God, our listening Ear, the God who sees us, YAHWEH ROI! Father God is always there for us comforting us, like a father figure who supports can carry us when we are down. I have fond memories of me and my dad when I was very young, my dad would carry and piggy back me on his shoulders and ask me :” Son will you also carry me when I’m old?”, Elvis Elijah Wan :”Yes of course dad!”… (It’s such moments that make a strong man like weep, awwww) Anyways, just as our dads take care of us, our Father God does so but EVEN more!

Psalm 73

²⁶ My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.

Psalm 84:12
O LORD Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you.

Psalm 84:5
Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.

Through out these few weeks, I saw many of my friends also having problems in their lives. I ask them what they are going to do or how are they going to settle that particular problem and they will answer:” By luck/See what happens…”. Their answers always shows a inconsistency or a lack of hope because they are afraid of disappointment. I’m not judging or accusing but what I’m pointing out is this, people in the world(Non Christians) DON’T have the faith or hope in the things they do.

However I always find Christians (well not all anyways) have the Hope and Faith in our Lord Jesus Christ! We KNOW that God is bigger than our problems, we KNOW that God will lead us, we KNOW that God can settle our problems, we KNOW that God cares about is, we KNOW that God loves us!

Jesus love us, we don’t need to look for other sources or any replacement. Jesus cares about us, to the point that even if our parents or close ones forsake us HE won’t leave us…..

Psalm 27:10 (New International Version)

¹⁰ Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.

So many things non-Christians/Christians experience that are so damaging and they really need God to heal and lead them but they just can’t. We can, let us(Christians) bring this path to them?

One more thing, I don’t look at God as a “emotional rubbish bin” as when only I’m sad, hurt or in pain then I seek Him. God is my God, He is the founder, creator and Lord of my life. I NEED Him more than He needs me, Father You are YAHWEH! God of gods, Lord of Hosts! Praise and glory be on to You! Hallelujah!

I think it’s time, time to rebuild. I have to heal and get myself ready for school,life and continue in this relationship with God. I really have a lot of things to do now.

Isaiah 6

⁶ Then one of the seraphs flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar. ⁷ With it he touched my mouth and said, “See, this has touched your lips; your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for.”

⁸ Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”
And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”

⁹ He said, “Go and tell this people:
” ‘Be ever hearing, but never understanding;
be ever seeing, but never perceiving.’

I think Isaiah was kinda “challenged” by God to do His work and bring the house of Israel back to Him. The coal has touched my lips and I am now being made whole again by Jesus. But I need to work on my priorities to focus on God together with the pursuit of excellence for my final exams. I’ve got 8 more weeks to go and I’ll be a free man!

I’ve got to let go of the past and embrace the future! I always like to draw from Jeremiah 29:11 but it’s really time to BELIEVE in what God can do in my life. I really like what Brother Michael preached on Saturday. I need to DARE to experience God’s miracles, EVERYONE of us need God’s miracle in our lives but do we dare and believe?

I guess I’m pretty much “challenged” to do so, in my relationships and studies. I thank God that I’ve been able to go through these changes and well, time will tell.

Time will determine and be an indicator to whether what I’m doing is right in sight of God. Do pray for me that I’ll be prepared for my exams and Polytechnic!

God bless!

I think I did a lot of weird stuff lately, I’ve been very blinded by my emotions and I thank God for all of you bros to give me advice on how to settle it.

Today I went out with my uncle from Riverlife, well I didn’t know how manage to get in contact with him. His been serving as a marriage  counselor for many years so I thought that it would be good to listen to his advice and not let my emotions control me.

Had lunch with him at his home area, he kinda made things easier for me to analyze.

1) God

2) Priorities

3) Her

Uncle Francis:” Elvis, I believe that your a bit young for relationships but I’m not saying this is not possible. She’s not a Christian yet so her view will definitely be different from yours and Long Distance Relationships work out scarcely maybe 1 in 100 couples? I think you recently place her as your first right?  I used to do it when I was younger and pursuing some girls, it’s okay but you need to learn to handle your emotions ASAP, don’t let this affect you!Your young so it’s natural to be crazy for a while but you need to know this : Is she making you a better person?, Is she affecting your relationship with God?” , as years progress you’ll find that your taste in women will change but if she is yours then NO MATTER what happens she’ll still be yours. From my point of view it’s better for you to just be good friends and if God allows and have plans, then you decide to go Australia to pursue her or not.

Now just do well in your studies, focus in the word and wait for the Lord. In her culture, I’m not cursing but probably she’ll find a boyfriend in 3 months? Tell me more in 3 weeks time. Meanwhile studies, NS and bless your parents “

I am able to accept the lesson, Huanyan said this :”Where is God in all those madness, when you cannot even control your own emotions and passions? Dun talk about letting God leading you when you are not following Him properly”….

I accept that these few weeks I’ve let my emotions master over me, I am willing to work on these emotions to handle things more cautiously

ARGH forgive me my madness!

I’ll take these years and time to see , I’m going to the Lord for counsel!

Wow! Recently a lot confusion and complication came into my life but, the thing is…I’m not afraid or regretful. I am interested to see how Father God will lead the way and show me what to do in the purest and appropriate way. I think some of you who are close to me know that I recently fell for someone. I didn’t know why? Her warmth? Her laugh? Is it because she’s cute? Or was it because it’s because it’s her?

I thought of myself as a different type of person and the women that I’m into are different too. Different in the sense of uniqueness and I think she’s unique bahs… On the 4th of January I told her that I like her, I didn’t use LOVE because a very wise man once told me :”Love should increase with knowledge”, I went to ponder and find it to be true because if I just say I love. then it would be pointless and childish. The level of love should increase with the knowledge of that person, that’s something for teenagers to think about.

Here come’s the unexpected… She kinda like me too…I was like HO DANG! (aussie slang for oh damn). Then on the 5th, received a call and we chatted for 1 hour. But that hour seemed like a few seconds! WEIRD! It’s Einstein’s theory of relativity, whereby when doing something you enjoy, you experience time faster! I went to pray that God will lead the way and show us if it’s “okay”.

Sent her and family to the airport, it was awkward! So many things to say but can’t be said because her parents were around. Then her dad treated us to a dinner, we went to the terminal. Hugged and said our good byes. Shook her hand for the one last time, tears flowed from her eyes and I just watched her slipped away from me, SLIPPED away……Don’t you cry tonight because I’ll still be there.

When you turned away and went into the customs, I noticed you turned back. Was sad that you had to leave, but I’m glad to have known you!  Then on the 6th was able to meet her online and that was where things got complicated…Just did some sharing and played some songs on the guitar and she cried again…I was like…Oh man!

I won’t hurt you!

Many times you may have been disappointed but I know that I’m different from all those people!  I really pray that you’ll be able to heal, prepare for your UNI studies! I’ll continue to pray, to pray for you!

We’ll see, when God has a will, He will lead the way! I believe that when you saw my name in the train, it was not just a coincidence! But let this all just rest for a while, let’s go into “PAUSE” mode. Wait, let us wait for my Father, my Father will show what to do and where to go!

I believe that prayers to Him are not in vain!

Lord I want You to be in the picture, I want You to be honored, I want You Lord my Father to be the one leading us!

Lord make me more matured! Show me how to live and most importantly show me how to LOVE!

In Jesus name AMEN!

No matter the pain, let Your will be done not mine. For even Jesus didn’t deny the cup that You gave to Him, so let me not deny this chalice that has been given to me!

This is the season to be jolly, lah, lah,lah….

Wow my Genting trip was awesome I really thank God for blessing me throughout the whole journey.

There were mainly 3 things which I want to show gratitude for

1) TRANSPORT: When we (my family) went to buy the tickets and settle the accommodations (hotel..stuffs) I was kinda thinking that :” Oh man, we got the tickets too late and all the transportation and rooms will probably suck as everyone got the good rooms!”

Then during the day of of our trip, when we arrived at the spot which the coach was suppose to fetch us…And my my my…it was a “STALLION” a “Monster Coach” equipped with super engines and state of the art seats

2) UPGRADE: My day was brighten but not looking forward to the hotel as it will most probably suck. And God amazed me again, the Genting Hotel apparently upgraded us from a 3rd grade room to a 2nd grade for free! There were extra rooms for us

3) Little Losses: The 3rd thing which I was amazed was that my parents actually lost less that 500 rm in the Casinos! LOL! Usually they will lose probably 1k SG? That’s like a person’s one month wager! crap Should have “donated” it to me instead….

It was really a good fellowship and I got to eat,eat and EAT! Shocked that my dad suddenly had an interest in fine dining, went to the seafood restaurants and ordered all the crabs,fishes and crazy stuff…..Though it was Yummy :p

Then came back to SG early, joined Jootat,Jan and Ellson for KTV. Was FUN! It’s interesting to hang out with older bros in Christ! Very humorous attempts to “sync” and sing DUETS despite that we are all GUYS! SO you can imagine the CHAOS! FALLLSEEETOOOS (Falsettos) and all the screaming! “One night in Beijing…” all those funny songs.

We ended with “给我一千个伤心的理由。。。。” LOLS!

The next day was also fun, my friend Felix asked me out to meet some Aussie friends (Sunny and Susanna) and also his gf Madeline. I was very blessed to know more about western culture! I thought it was very interesting! Here we are the people from the same race (Chinese) but we are so different in subtle elements; speech, views, culture..etc. Went to watch this movie, Bodyguards and Assassins. Was a cool movie, they took 10 years to make it so it does have “quality” but certain parts were ABSOLUTELY OBSOLETE!

Wanted to bring them to POMO but it was…unfortunately CLOSED. I can still remember Susanna asking me :”Are their Bentas good?”…I was like:”HUH?” I “HUH” for like 10 times man! Cuz her accent was so…”powderful”, she was able to however speak in Singlish which I am surprised! She meant “benTOOOOS”! lols

Thank God my sis introduced me to this chicken rice store around Selegie, and I think they loved it (phew manage to pull this off lols). Suppose to eat “taohuay” but didn’t have time so sent them off and went home for a nap.

SAT,SUN,MON,TUES were all very interesting…Never have I did so much gym and basketball in my life man! Now it is 3.56 pm and I am preparing to go out to shop for gifts and clubbing

DEAR JOURNAL….

Matthew 15

Clean and Unclean

¹Then some Pharisees and teachers of the law came to Jesus from Jerusalem and asked, ²“Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!”

³Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition? ⁴For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother’^[a] and ‘Anyone who curses his father or mother must be put to death.’^{[b] 5}But you say that if a man says to his father or mother, ‘Whatever help you might otherwise have received from me is a gift devoted to God,’ ⁶he is not to ‘honor his father^[c]‘ with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. ⁷You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you:
⁸” ‘These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
⁹They worship me in vain;
their teachings are but rules taught by men.’^[d]“

As I was reading Matthew 15 today, it kinda re-affirm me on the various ways of worship. Jesus reprimanded the Pharisees for “enslaving” people using humanized preconceived ways, the key word is “tradition”…a “killer” word hehes. Then I was reflecting whether I tried to worship or proximate my relationship with God through these traditions by man?

Being humans we have a lot of ideas of how things ought to be done, often those ways may differ for different individuals. It’s just like playing the guitar, some people like to use the pick (not pig…), others may like using their nails.

The point is there are no specific ways for Christians to worship and build a relationship with God but we know a KEY is through reading of the BIBLE. I’ve once heard a Christian marathon runner said this :”When I am on the field running, I feel  God smiling and I can hear the angels applauding for me!” I was pretty awed and blessed by these words.

It’s like saying :”Hey our God is a dynamic and creative God, if you’re a runner use running as a vessel to worship God and bring people to know Him, if you’re a musician use your music to praise and bless the unbelievers, if you’re a teacher, teach with love and show people how God was able to teach you…etc!”

And the thing is, we should not force our traditions on people. You know, I recently watched a TV program showing  children drawing creative and colorful pictures. Pink trees, Orange skies and Purple dinosaurs (Roar Barney!) and well…., the teacher stopped them and told them :”No,No,No it should not be done this way, there is no such things as pink trees, orange skies and purple dinosaurs….it should be done that way…..”. Then as time progresses these children will lose their creativity and ability to “picture” things and get trapped within a “square” .

God can be found in the most unexpected places, there is a natural “way” or gifts that our Father have blessed us with. And I believe through these gifts we are able to bless others and feel for ourselves how real our God can be. As for me, I am now on a journey to find my gifts and connect with Father.

Recently I’ve been very un-focused maybe because of food poisoning, or perhaps the traditions of man? Well the thing is that I am healing now, I must keep my sight on Him, the race may be taxing but the prize is Him …. Lord if You are willing, then run with me……

Today my reflections through reading the Word are……

• There are no specific “models” to connect with God…it can be anything!
• I want to find my natural “path” to Him
• Don’t “entrap” people with traditions

When I was 19 I asked myself this question :”If logic vs emotion which will win?”, at that point of my life I thought logic will always prevail against emotions. In many cases logic will make the “better” choice morally,financially…etc. Man no matter the gender, will always take the choice that “feels” good instead of what OUGHT to be done.  Example : Why would a multi-millionaire with a happy family like Tiger woods commit adultery? Why would a senior pastor murder his girl friend?……  

Jeremiah 17:9 (New International Version)  

 ⁹ The heart is deceitful above all things
       and beyond cure.
       Who can understand it?  

When we talk about “Heart” we deal with Emotion! To me if I am made to define emotion I would say it is an instrument that AMPLIFIES an action, whether if it’s a choice,decision or deed done. Emotions adds satisfaction to the choice being made. 

  Whereas logic is “hard”, “right”… logic points out what SHOULD be done to get the best results.  Those were my thoughts when I was on the bus one day, I thank God for showing me certain principles to learn. The thing is man is stubborn, if you give them a choice, chances are they will take the easy and the path of instant-gratification. That includes myself, so throughout my journey as a believer I will at times try to rationalise if my choices are by emotion or logic and most important is it right in sight of God.  

 Still, emotions are not all bad at all. But due to the sinful nature of man, our emotions are corrupted so it is really IMPORTANT to CHECK your emotions. Use the Word of God (BIBLE) to refer and ask church people for affirmation, why church people? BECAUSE it’s the church people are the ones that can help you the most, the world people may be good friends and confidants but they will not be able to give you the “best” choice which is in the point of a believer and right in sight of God! 

 Proverbs 27:17 (New International Version)  

 ¹⁷ As iron sharpens iron,
       so one man sharpens another. 

Oh ya I forgot to point out, EVEN logic may be ”flawed” at times hahas….As I pointed out in the beginning, man is corrupt so even our ”logic” may not be logical at times hahaha…. So it really points to our God! Hallelujah  we have God to guide our paths !

 That is definitely an advantage we Christians have over other people and nations.   

Psalm 119:105 (New International Version) 

n Nun

 ¹⁰⁵ Your word is a lamp to my feet
       and a light for my path.

Let me ask you a question, “If the God that made the universe so precisely and intelligently, personally coach and guide you through out the way, and not only that, He bless you with all the best and give you great company of like-minded people, will you then make a wrong move?” NEVER!   

If God guides you, then you will never fail for He is God    

 Now the question is are we willing to follow?  When God leads you to make a decision, you may “feel” like doing it but God tells you NO, are you willing to accept? 

Sis and Bros, don’t let your emotions, or should I say “heart” fool you. The heart may say :” Go ahead, do it, sin against God” and it promises a “reward” but after that is only much pain and suffering. I believe most of us have experienced this. At the end of the day God will always be the better choice.  

I like how Yeuann put it, Yeuann:”Emotions are “Rocket Fuel”, Logic is the “Rocket”…. Emotions are powerful and it convicts you of the action……” 

I’d like to add-on one more thing, Logic=Rocket, Emotions=Rocket Fuel, God=GPS system! Why are emotions able to convict you of an action? 

Example: You go for a massage, and you feel great! Why is it so? Because the masseuse are pressing all the “right” spots and pressure points. So when you do something right, emotions “confirm” your action but your sense of “right” and “wrong” may be morally right or wrong too….. 

So I end this post with some questions to think about… 

1) Are you choices being made rationally and balanced or irrational? 

2) Are you letting God do His work; to guide you? 

3) Are the choices right in sight of God? 

Notice I didn’t use the word “morally” right, because I know that the point is that we cannot be “moral” by ourselves, only through God….The word points out that we are saved not by our works but by God LEST we become arrogant! 

So the emphasis is still the RELATIONSHIP with God!

I was very amazed at how naive I was, recently a lot of factors pushed me to conclude that my way of viewing people and opinions were completely FLAWED!

It was so obvious but I did not catch it, thank God that I was able to perceive this now. The whole world together with my inner paradigm are now completely shifted!

My views were so idealistic but it’s time to get real. I used to put on my own set of “glasses” and thought of people as cheery, happy, easy to work with. But these “glasses” or should I say pre-conceptions were an anathema to others.

So what’s there to be learn then? Perhaps to draw similarities and think in terms of their “reality”? Perhaps understanding about my flaws it that sense.

I just want to take time to reflect deeper and think about humanity in a realistic way…..

I feel like writing, giving a “window” of different people and how one opinion is realistic and another a fallicy.

Hahas, I was a boy but now I am a man…………..My eyes are opened and now I see……cold hard world but the only thing to look forward to is the Warmth of God!

Psalm 39 (New International Version)

6 Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro:
He bustles about, but only in vain;
he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it.

7 “But now, Lord, what do I look for?
My hope is in you.

Like Socrates said :”The unexamined life is not worth living.”

I have drawn some plans and conclusions to the things I would like to change and work on! Let it all bring glory to God

I went to reflect and ponder about my life,  about humanity itself and came up with 6 areas that a human being can be simplified to!

1 Spiritual (Our core)

2 Physical( Health and Body)

3 Material ( Finances)

4 Intellectual ( Knowledge and Wisdom)

5 Relationship with People!

6 Career/Academics

I know that we have only one life to live, so let’s make it an enjoyable and blessed one!

HERE ARE MY PLANS! GIVE ME SOME ADVICE OR COMMENTS SIS AND BROS! FOR

Proverbs 24:6 (New American Standard Bible)

⁶For ^(A)by wise guidance you will wage war,
And ^(B)in abundance of counselors there is victory.

Spiritual

Goal: The “goal” of Christianity itself if simplified to the purest of form would be to build a good if not, EXCELLENT relationship with our Father God. Many people will have different ideologies about our faith but “relationship” SHOULD be the key (Go reflect on that!)

Through: To build a relationship with God, involves 2 different “instruments”,

1) The BIBLE:
Prayer is when we “speak” to our Father BUT reading the bible is when our Father speaks to us. I am not a smart person but I know this fact ” I’D BETTER LET GOD SPEAK TO ME MORE THAN I SPEAK TO GOD!”

2)PRAYER

Yep here is when we ask our supplications and petitions before our Maker through our Lord Jesus

A) Reading Bible

B) Prayer on Relationship with God, Christ likeness (Restored,Healed,cleansed,perfected) through Holy Spirit

C) Blessing on Family

D) Blessing on personal life

E) Blessings on Sis and Bros in Church

Physical

Goals: Health, Muscles and Stamina

Through 1) Gym 2) Cardio (Swim,Run…)

Academics

Goal: Degree

Through maintaining my GPA/CAP of 4 getting into SP, then get a GPA/CAP of 4 again fun fun fun!!!

Intellectual

Goals: To be a learned man in many areas! RENAISSANCE

Through:

1) The reading of 1 book per week (though I would read more haha)

2) Do Amath, then Cmath and if possible Fmath!

Material/Finances

Goals: Blessings on self and others

Through:

1) Saving 20% of my weekly allowance

2) Preparing and reading up on Unit trusts, Common/Preferred stock, Options and Fore x. (Which all I eventually did when I was 19 but I am inexperienced)

3) Saving 40% of my NS pay and start trading in blue chips and volitile stocks!

Relationship with people

Goals: To build sincere and blessed relationships with people, Christians and Non Christians alike!

Recently I went to ask a brother for feedback and he mentioned that I often like to drift my conversations to a more intellectual content. For this brother, he loves it but for others it might be  just plain weird LOL! SORRY PEOPLE :p

I remembered meeting up with some POLY friends a few weeks back and when we were just talking about Christianity and about Paul’s journey to Corinth.

A POLY girl  said to me :” Wow I don’t understand a single thing you said…lols “

Elvis:” Really arh! LOL ok paiseh paiseh, aiya just know this, Paul went on a trip then preach gospel lor!”

So…….. I have decided!!!! To whomever I am with, I shall “synch” my conversation to that person itself! BWAHAHAA! YEP! That is what I shall do!

And also to just bless others with the best of my capability!